Hello July
Julyyyyy is here!
Happy Sunday to you all!
I have been through such a season of GROWTH & LEARNING. It is one of those "bring it all into the storehouses" kinds of seasons, where I am just storing up lessons and letting them teach me day in and day out. (Okay, I am more stubborn than that but you already know that God and I wrestle a little before we get on the same page!)
To update you all, this summer has been full of unexpected interruptions. Those interruptions have jostled me in a way that has shifted my viewpoint on several things, which will become evident as I discern the Lord's leading on how to share!
I have recently had some big relationships in my life redefined- some harder than others. I am confident you can relate to seasons where your relationships changed a lot! It can be hard, humbling, and most of all- exposing.
I think that would describe my month of June best: EXPOSED.
By moving from my friend's home, back to my house and then from one room back to the room I grew up in (for the first time in 3 years), I have had to redefine a new normal. Here I am, living in the house I grew up in for most of my life, and things are so different.
I am reading the book Boundaries by Cloud and Townsend, and learning that I have a say in my boundaries even with my parents. Now that I am more of an adult (like, seriously, I am an adult-kid?!? How do you even navigate that!!!), it is my responsibility to communicate certain things to them- and there is a healthy, respectful way to do that. So that is very new! And challenging! But also 100% worth it. It makes me feel exposed when I state what I would like from them, like space to work on my side business, or a break to go read for 10 minutes before talking about my day. Before, I would just be exhausted and mentally elsewhere while they spoke to me right after work. I am learning that by setting the ten minute boundary, I am showing them more respect because I can earnestly engage in what they are sharing with me! It's a win-win!
Another way I feel rather exposed is through some comments that were said to me. This is a personal blog, and while I try not to overshare, I do strive to share enough that can be helpful, relevant, and beneficial to you/people in your spheres of influence.
That being said, I recently had someone close to me share some comments about something I was insecure about for a number of years. While I hoped the conversation was well-meaning, through some follow up questions I quickly clarified that their motive was to be controlling and to conform me into someone who would make them look better if I did XYZ. Unfortunately, that situation was not the first of that kind with this individual, and some major boundaries had to be set. My heart and self esteem took a hit, as old lies crept into my head again.
How many of you know what it's like to be triggered and launched into an old fear you thought you'd already defeated?
Well, thankfully, Jesus is MY Savior. What was meant for harm, God uses for good. I am in the sea of fighting to gain ground again, because those old thoughts returned with quite a vengeance, let me tell you!!! But like I said, God uses ALL things for the GOOD of those who love Him!
Here are some ways that God is working overtime in the Good department:
ps keep seeking Jesus! He is the AUTHOR AND PERFECTOR of our faith! When you don't know what to do, ask Him! ;) We can figure this out together with Jesus!
Happy Sunday to you all!
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| Mom + Me at Yosemite hiking this summer |
I have been through such a season of GROWTH & LEARNING. It is one of those "bring it all into the storehouses" kinds of seasons, where I am just storing up lessons and letting them teach me day in and day out. (Okay, I am more stubborn than that but you already know that God and I wrestle a little before we get on the same page!)
To update you all, this summer has been full of unexpected interruptions. Those interruptions have jostled me in a way that has shifted my viewpoint on several things, which will become evident as I discern the Lord's leading on how to share!
I have recently had some big relationships in my life redefined- some harder than others. I am confident you can relate to seasons where your relationships changed a lot! It can be hard, humbling, and most of all- exposing.
I think that would describe my month of June best: EXPOSED.
By moving from my friend's home, back to my house and then from one room back to the room I grew up in (for the first time in 3 years), I have had to redefine a new normal. Here I am, living in the house I grew up in for most of my life, and things are so different.
I am reading the book Boundaries by Cloud and Townsend, and learning that I have a say in my boundaries even with my parents. Now that I am more of an adult (like, seriously, I am an adult-kid?!? How do you even navigate that!!!), it is my responsibility to communicate certain things to them- and there is a healthy, respectful way to do that. So that is very new! And challenging! But also 100% worth it. It makes me feel exposed when I state what I would like from them, like space to work on my side business, or a break to go read for 10 minutes before talking about my day. Before, I would just be exhausted and mentally elsewhere while they spoke to me right after work. I am learning that by setting the ten minute boundary, I am showing them more respect because I can earnestly engage in what they are sharing with me! It's a win-win!
Another way I feel rather exposed is through some comments that were said to me. This is a personal blog, and while I try not to overshare, I do strive to share enough that can be helpful, relevant, and beneficial to you/people in your spheres of influence.
That being said, I recently had someone close to me share some comments about something I was insecure about for a number of years. While I hoped the conversation was well-meaning, through some follow up questions I quickly clarified that their motive was to be controlling and to conform me into someone who would make them look better if I did XYZ. Unfortunately, that situation was not the first of that kind with this individual, and some major boundaries had to be set. My heart and self esteem took a hit, as old lies crept into my head again.
How many of you know what it's like to be triggered and launched into an old fear you thought you'd already defeated?
Well, thankfully, Jesus is MY Savior. What was meant for harm, God uses for good. I am in the sea of fighting to gain ground again, because those old thoughts returned with quite a vengeance, let me tell you!!! But like I said, God uses ALL things for the GOOD of those who love Him!
Here are some ways that God is working overtime in the Good department:
- I get to remember (very vividly, ahem) that God has saved me from lies and darkness
- I can and am proclaiming increased healing in an area that now has the opportunity to more fully heal
- I am humbled and exposed before God, which allows me to more readily accept and apply His teaching of Truth to my life
- I can rely on God to clarify His purposes in my life, where insecurities once lay.
- I can see where God is moving in my life right now! Not only have yucky things been exposed, but God's glory and goodness have also been magnified in this season!!!
Well friend, thank you for reading thus far! That's all for now, but like I said, that is just the tipppp of the iceberg and there will be more lessons shared from this season, I am sure of it!
I hope and pray you all are well. I know we have our ups and downs in life! While I wish you to be on an "up" and rejoice if that is your season, I am also standing with you in your "down," should that be the space where God is meeting you today. God's heart is so vast, that He is there in the valleys and mountaintops... Let us not forget Who is by our side!
Love,
Mel xoxo
ps keep seeking Jesus! He is the AUTHOR AND PERFECTOR of our faith! When you don't know what to do, ask Him! ;) We can figure this out together with Jesus!
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