Growing Doesn't {Always} Mean Blooming.

So here's this word, 'bloom.'

What an interesting one for this season. Interesting because... I don't feel like I'll be blooming. I feel like a I am headed toward drought. Strained growth. Dry, brittle roots and cursed winds.

But if God is bigger than my circumstances, He most certainly is bigger than my home environment. Bigger than the swallowing flood that sucks air from my lungs like home robs the peace from my soul.

Being home is much harder than I'd thought. Far, far away from my closest friends, and even farther from the false reality that I tried so hard to believe of my family being well.

Even though the fighting and pain showed its familiar face the very day I arrived home, I know I am supposed to be here. Yet I am already tempted to run. Run by being busy instead of present. Or even by physically going away... I have these real choices.

But I also have this challenge. To grow, wherever I am planted. To sow seeds today which I will reap in my future.

I am challenged to stay. To fight for (and pray for) a family of love and of heavenly peace. To sow seeds of putting my family first. Seeds that say family matters, love matters- and they are both so worth fighting for.

I think it's funny that growth doesn't always mean "blooming." We'd like for it to always be in the prettiest stage, sure. But some plants aren't always flowering. Inevitably, there is pre-blooming prep-time for plants! Old flowers fall off. Then the plant sits barren-looking for a while. Even sits through snow or rainy seasons. Then, buds come. And finally, flowers.

In those times of barrenness, of snow, and of rain- she still grows. that plant's roots are forced to plunge deep, deep into the nutrients of the earth and has to will to be deeply rooted. Fighting to stand strong, these pre-blooming times keep the plant grounded. And that's where I am headed.

Deep to the depths.
Far from the fickle environment around me- because as much as I'd like sunshine, it's looking like rain.


God, may my roots dig deep into you, finding the nutrients of love, joy, hope, and peace as I reach into your depths. Help me to see the bigger picture that makes this season worth enduring.

Love,
Mel XOXO

{Dedicated to my friend Briana- because we can do all things through Christ who strengthens us! Love ya!}